I'm too damn young to feel this damn tired. This picture just about sums up how I feel, but in case you're not the intuitive kind, let me sum it up for you. I am a mess. A mess in my head and a mess in my heart. Some days I wake up thinking I know up from down, but that's just me trying to be as positive as possible. That's just me trying to put on a happy face so no one worries. It's me trying to WILL life to take the turns I want it to. And it's not working. I'm all out of pep talks and cliches to get me through the day. This sinking has been a long time coming, and in many ways I asked for it. I asked for it by waiting for things to just happen. By letting things slide. I convinced myself I was doing all I could, but I haven't been. That was a lie I told myself to make myself feel better. I've let days fly by and drag by. I've let opportunities walk away and today I feel the weight of all those lost days crashing down around me. There are a lot of facets of this mess that I just don't have the power to fix, there is no going back in time and doing it over. There's no taking back a decision, or making a decision that I now wish I'd made. No do-overs. So where does that leave me? It leaves tired, crying, and tired of crying. For me there is only one move to make and that move is to summon the strength to pull myself up. I know it's there, because I've done it time and time again. I'm sinking-but I haven't sunk.
I'm Lauren. I love soaking up new people and new experiences. I'm an artist, photographer, actress, and a dreamer. and professional bruncher. I realize I probably have terrible grammar. I am not ashamed of this. English is the worst. Some would say I'm an old soul. I tend to be dramatic, and I eat waaay too much Mexican food.
I don't consider myself a writer, I'm not a writer, I just write. It's a way to express my feelings, what's inside of me, and let out whatever emotions are trying to push their way out of me. I also like to tell stories, make people laugh, inspire people, help and educate people about things I am passionate about in the world around us. I hope at least some of what's here does at least some of that for at least one person.