When I was a young, silly, girl, looong before I knew anything about the idea of parallel universes or alternate realities, or even science fiction- I believed there was another world on the other side of my mirror. I was so sure that the girl staring back at me (my own reflection) was living in a world that looked very similar to mine, but was indeed far different than the world I was living in. I'd stare at her, try to have conversations with her-I'd touch my hand to the smooth, cool glass and I would close my eyes. I'd wait for her to pull me through, let me cross over into her magical, perfect world. The world in the mirror. It was a world free of pain and fear and disappointment. A world with no annoying little brother, no fighting parents, or mean kids at school. No heartbreak or loneliness. No death. That other me didn't have to go to school, and it was always springtime in her world. There was rain (I've always loved rain) but no hurricanes or tornadoes or scary things like that. She didn't live in a one story house in a small town smack dab in the middle of a swamp. Oh no, she lived in a huge purple castle by the ocean. The other me had mermaids for best friends and if she wanted to, she could turn into one and swim to a beautiful underwater city to play with other mermaids and fish. The other me had a beautiful singing voice and she wore the most beautiful dresses all the time.
Sometimes, I would wake up in the middle of the night and peek behind my mirror in hopes that some secret portal may have opened up. It was never there. I wanted so badly to be a part of that perfect, magical world behind the mirror. Where all my dreams would come true.
I still find myself looking for that today. Some doorway waiting to lead me into some other life. Some perfect life. A life without pain or heartbreak. Don't we all do this? Find ourselves searching for a place, a life where there are no mistakes. Where all wrongs are forgiven and forgotten. A life where the choices we make won't hurt anyone and where every choice is the perfect choice. Somewhere where happiness comes easy, with no exceptions or catches. A place where we can live by our hearts, without our brains mucking everything up.
That other world doesn't exist, and I"m sure if there are versions of us all in some parallel existence, they probably don't have it as easy as that girl in the mirror land I so often dreamed of. There isn't any point in wishing we were somewhere else- there isn't anywhere else to go. This is it. We are here, in this place and this time. There is so much goodness and happiness here. There is also shit. A lot of shit. There is blood and pain and tears. Hurt and hunger and heartbreak. There's guilt and hate. It is up to us to make THIS world, our only one, into what we want it to be. WE have the power to choose to embrace the good, and change the bad. To conquer our fears and to mend heartache. We have the power to forgive and we have the strength inside of us to push on, despite some sadness in our hearts, when we cannot forget. We are all so much stronger than we give ourselves credit for. No more waiting for doorways or wishing with eyes closed. It's time to live with eyes open, and stop pushing against the glass.